What I am sharing in here may feel triggering to a lot of people in respect to what I have done and also in terms of what I have not done. By this post, I am not promoting any sort of wrongdoings but just sharing what happened with me and how I dealt with things from there on.
I am married and mother to two. My house is bit away from the main road so I have to get off the main road and walk some distance to reach my home after work. I used to home by late evening and I had to walk next to a partly constructed abandoned building with no neighborhood around it but a few guys used to get together there to time pass and do their things. I have noticed them ogling me almost every time I walked across that place. It felt uncomfortable but I had no other way to home so I had to walk through that place over and over again.
Then that fateful day came. I was walking back home right next to the building as always and I saw two guys were standing in my way. I tried to walk past them but one of them grabbed my mouth and the other one came right behind me and lifted me off by my waist and both of them carried me inside the building. I resisted as hard as I could but it was all in vain. In there, I saw three more guys waiting and these two got me laid on the floor and one of them still kept my mouth closed with his hand.
I felt them removing my lower clothes and when I fluttered my legs the guy covering my mouth also kept a hand over my neck tight, like a warning and by this time my body was going to shutdown mode. I was scared and I could no longer respond and couldn’t move an inch of my body. By this time I felt my panties being ripped off and I couldn’t look down from shame in being a ‘show’ for five strangers. I felt the first one entering me. I was dry and it was painful for me. I wanted to scream but couldn’t. I just laid there with my eyes closes, taking everything they were inflicting upon me.
One by one, everyone took their turns and after the fifth guy was done with me, they threatened to harm my kids if I ever pen my mouth about this to anyone and they left. I still laid there for a while regaining myself and acknowledging what just happened with me. Suddenly, the thought about home came to my mind and I cleaned up the mess they left with my handkerchief. I put my clothes back on and started walking back to my place in a rush. I wanted to cry but I couldn’t. I reached home and behaved normally and said a fake excuse for being late. I never said anything about it to anyone. I just couldn’t.
I took a week off from work citing that I was not well. The next week, I went back to work and walked back through the same road in the evening and the same group of guys was still there. “Come in” one of them said to me. I paused. “Want us to come there?” he asked and without thinking I walked right into the building. I don’t know why but I did. Same story again. Though this time they were tad gentle because I was ‘cooperating’.
This ‘cooperation’ went on and off for almost two years. In fact I myself was surprised to find out that I was getting wet for these guys and even came with them. In between this they left the town in search of jobs at various points of time. The last guy left the place three months ago. So far no one knows about this and as far as I am concerned, I will never share this to anyone in person. And to be fair, I am not looking for sympathy or support in here, but just a place to share this. That’s all.
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